If you’ve spent more than five minutes browsing swinging profiles or chatting at a lifestyle party, you’ve probably noticed a pattern:

Most men list themselves as straight, while most women mention some level of interest in other women, whether they phrase it as bi-curious, bisexual, open to female play, and so on.

It’s one of those fascinating cultural quirks of the lifestyle, and it says a lot about how fluid attraction can be when people finally step outside traditional monogamy.

Bisexuality (or even just bi-curiosity) exists on a wide, beautiful spectrum.

For some women, same-sex play is about sensuality or playfulness or teasing rather than orientation. For others, it’s an authentic expression of their sexuality.

And it’s not just women. Plenty of men are curious, questioning, or quietly exploring softer or more experimental forms of play, even if they don’t label themselves as “bi.”

(Labels can feel restrictive when the goal is simply to experience and enjoy.)

Many people in the lifestyle realize that attraction often depends more on energy and connection than gender, basically that people are drawn to people. Once you remove the expectation of monogamy, it’s easier to admit that your desires might be a bit more flexible than you thought, and that your type is not strictly defined.

As some of my male gay friends like to joke, “The gay community basically invented non-monogamy.”

In fact, in those circles, being in a closed, monogamous relationship is often the exception, not the standard.

So when you look at the swinging scene as a whole, it’s not surprising to see that absolute definitions of “straight” or “gay” don’t always fit perfectly.

The lifestyle creates a space where people can try things, talk about them, and learn what truly turns them on, and do it without judgment.

There are even events and parties designed specifically for people who identify (or play) somewhere along the bisexual spectrum, like “Bi-to-Cap” week in Cap d’Agde, or gender-specific events such as “Scissor Sisters” events catering to women only, or "DILF" parties focusing on men only.

These spaces make it even easier to explore in an environment where curiosity is celebrated, not questioned.

Whether you’re there to watch, try, or dive right in, the energy at these events tends to be welcoming, body-positive, and full of people who get it.

At its heart, the lifestyle is about openness to people, to sensations, and to experiences.

You don’t have to fit into a category or explain yourself. You just have to know your boundaries, communicate them clearly, and stay curious.

So if you’ve ever wondered what it might feel like to explore your attraction beyond your usual type… the lifestyle is one of the few spaces where that exploration is not only accepted but celebrated.

In the Playful Partners Courses, we explore these layers of curiosity, from attraction and communication to boundaries, emotions, and the fun of finding what truly fits you.

Because no label, rule, or expectation should limit your pleasure or your connection.

Want more guidance on navigating connections in the lifestyle?

If you are part of a couple and want to explore the swinging world with your partner, check our COURSE FOR COUPLES!

If you are a single man and dedicated to build trusting and your reputation, then THE SINGLE MAN PLAYBOOK is the right fit for you!